Tenser, said the Tensor

This I Believe #35

...that Michio Kaku and Michiko Kakutani should get married, so they can go around being announced as Michio and Michiko Kaku-Kakutani.

This I Believe #34

...that in David Bowie's song "Dance Magic Dance" from the film Labyrinth, the part of the chorus that goes:

Dance magic, dance
...
Jump magic, jump

...should instead go:

Pants, magic pants
...
Junk, magic junk

Note the commas.  If you have no idea what I'm talking about, I can only suggest that you probably didn't see the movie on the big screen.  Boy, that was a lot of information about David Bowie.

(For those of you keeping track, yes, this the second "The I Believe" post in a row that's about the lyrics to David Bowie songs.  Will this trend continue?  No man can say...)

This I Believe #33

...that in David Bowie's "Ziggy Stardust", the phrase "making love with his ego" was intended to have an instrumental, rather than comitative or reciprocal, reading.

This I Believe #32

It should be considered false advertising to claim that a car is propelled by a "Hybrid Synergy Drive" if that car is incapable of exceeding the speed of light, or, at least, of achieving high-γ sublight speeds.  Here's a rule of thumb: if you didn't have to adjust your watch when you arrived at your destination, no hybrid synergy occurred.

This I Believe #31

Eye cannon shall obey.

This I Believe #30

If you're going to have the operation, you know, have the operation.

This I Believe #29

"I have come," [Frodo] said.  "But I do not choose now to do what I came to do.  I will not do this deed.  The Ring is mine!"

EPIC FAIL

This I Believe #28

...that gastroenterologists, proctologists, and other doctors who deal with the lower digestive tract must, many times each day, have to stifle the impulse to insert "It nearly killed him!" into otherwise professional-sounding sentences.

This I Believe #27

Money will always be paper, but gold will always be gold.

This I Believe #26

If wishes were horses, we'd all be eating steak.